First Date

Dating can be hard. Or rather, going on one date can be easy but launching from one date into two or three may be more difficult. Because of this, here are another few things never to say or talk about on a first date, if you’d like a second.

- Why you hate your mother. Save it for your analyst, not for the woman or man you are trying to woo.

- Any physical aberrations. First dates are not the time to say, “Hey, I have six toes on my left foot” or “I have a third nipple.” Though that may pique a person’s interest for a look-see, it will automatically label you as “extra-toe chick” or “weird nipple guy” before the person even gets to know the real you.

- The number of people you slept with or haven’t slept with. This will either make you look cheap , like a prude, or desperate.

- The amount of money you make or don’t make. This will make you look like either a show-off or a complainer. Keep your finances to yourself for a while. It’s nobody’s business but yours, your accountants—if you have one, and the IRS.

- Favorite porn magazines or movies. If One Night in Paris was the best movie you ever saw, no one needs to know. The reason should be self-evident.

- Your biggest celebrity crush. No female will ever feel as attractive (or curvy) as Pamela Anderson. Don’t inadvertently put down your date by saying you’ve always had the hots for some hyper-plastic celebrity. A mere mortal will feel, “If that’s the type of people he goes for, I don’t have a chance.”

- Calculus, physics, or cold fusion—unless of course you both are mathematicians, scientists or computer engineers. Talking about “smart” things won’t necessarily make the look smart. It could make your date think you are a nerd, a geek, or pretentious.

- Don’t name drop, including place names. Though your date may be interested in your travels, he doesn’t need to know you went to The Hamptons and dined at the same restaurant as Billy Joel or that you went to St. Moritz and skied with the Royal Family. Even if you are a close friend of Will and Harry, first dates don’t need to know…otherwise see c) under 7.

- That time when you got really drunk. Does a date really need to hear about your stupidity, vomiting and passing out? Do you really need to relive it? Talking about drunken episodes makes you sound like a frat boy/sorority girl with a Peter Pan syndrome.

- Any previous first dates you’ve had. No one wants to be the next person on your list whose anecdotes will shared with another date. Respect people’s privacy and they’ll respect yours.

Following these simple rules…and a little chemistry…should get you to date number two.